Disclaimer: I don't own the Biker Mice From Mars.
I make no money from this (wish I did, `cause I'm broke!). This is for the
fans of BM and to anyone who likes to read.
Writer's note; Sorry if it's a bit confusing to know who's talking and who
isn't, but all I can say in my defence is that this was my first attempt
to write a story with dialogue only. Hope ya like it anyway! Ride Free!
What to do?
June 5th, 2001
Copyright 2001, Gemini, all rights reserved
"Slow down Vincent!"
"What's the matter, babe? Afraid you're gonna fall off?"
"Hey! Get yer tail of me!"
"What?! Charley, this is a date, isn't it?"
"Yeah, and I'm already regretting it."
"Fine, you asked for it."
"That's what you get for riding with the baddest mamma jamma in the
"Ha ha. Very funny. Next time try to warn me when you turn like that,
"What ever you say sweetheart. Well, looks like we're there."
"You mean here. Get yer skates on, handsome, 'cause it's time to rock
"Quit whining, macho mouse! You were the one who wanted to go out with
me in the first place."
"Yeah, but as I recall, you were checking me out, so I figured what
"Oh sure, blame it all on me."
"Don't you have any balance?"
"You get to have all the fun."
"And all you get is bruises on your bump."
"Poetic, Charley, very poetic."
"Come on. It can't be that hard just to stand up."
"Well excuse me for not being used to standing on two weird shoes."
"They're called ice-skates, cutie, and I want you to know how to skate.
Who knows, it might be useful some day."
"Oh sure, the day I join the Disney on ice tour"
"Listen Vinnie I'm really glad you asked me out."
"Err, don't get all mushy babe, I'm not good at that stuff."
"Hey don't get me wrong pumpkin, having you here with me is the greatest
thing that has happened to me in a long time."
"Even though we're skating?"
"Yes, even though we're skating. But next time, I get to pick the place."
"Who said there's gonna be a next time?"
"Lady's gotta point, mouse. It's time to say bye bye!"
"What's oil-bucket doing here?"
"This is da bosses park, an' he wants da lake fer himself."
"Oh I get it. Old smelly fish finally decided to take a bath. How considerate."
"Shut up Vinnie, this is no time for joking."
"Spoil sport. You ain't no fun, Charley-girl!"
"Call Throttle and Modo."
"What?! Two words babe; No. Way. It's about time I whoop some Plutarkian
butt all by myself."
"Call them! Now!!"
"Chill, sweetie. I've got it under control! No reason for the guys
to get all the fun."
"I'll give you a reason, jerk! They're the reason!"
"Whoa! Limburger goons with extra cheese! Didn't quite see them."
"No. You get to Throttle and Modo. I'll deal with these dudes."
"It's hard enough to ride on ice with one rider, Charley! Besides,
the ice can't hold the weight of both of us. And I need you to get the bros."
"That's the first time you say you need me"
"Yeah, yeah, it's a Kodak-moment and all that. Now get going before
grease bucket starts the party without me!"
"Hey mouse! You scared of me? Bwahahaa!"
"Whooaa! These guys have some serious firearms! Time to raise the stakes!"
"Aah! Look out, da mouse has bombs!"
"And he's gonna use `em too. Say hi to `da boss' for me!"
"This game ain't over yet. I've still got a mouse to fry."
"What? Holy shi-"
"Looks like da mousy went for a swim, ha ha haa!"
"Get back lady, or we fry you too."
"If he's hurt, I swear you'll-"
"Don't worry Charley-ma'am."
"Yeah, we got this one. Modo, do you want to teach Greasepit how to
"Oh yes, Throttle, I'd love to. Too bad I left the air tank at home."
"Stay back mouses Da boss ain't gonna like this!"
"Look at `im go!"
"He should try out for the Olympics."
"Guys! Over here! Vinnie's still underwater!"
"We have to get him out. The water's freezing."
"You got that right, bro. Even my bionic arm can feel it!"
"Come on Vincent. Where are you?"
"Got him! Man, he's heavy. Time for a diet lill' bro."
"Modo, he's not breathing! Do something!"
"Don't worry Charlie, Modo knows what he's doing I hope."
"Oh thank God!"
"Come on, we have to get him warm and fast!"
"Here. Put my jacket on him. Modo, try to find his bike. I'll get Charlie
and Vinnie home."
"He's still stone cold. Oh, Throttle, this is all my fault!"
"Oh come on! You were out on a date! How could it be your fault? It's
Limburger. It's always been just Limburger."
"I wish he'll be okay"
"Charley, Vinnie's a tough mouse. He's been through a lot and survived,
remember? Besides, what's the worse that could happen? Flu?"
"I guess your right. I just wish he'd wake up."
"I know. I wish that too."
"Hey, where's Charley?"
"Hey big bro. She went to work on Vinnie's bike."
"Can you blame her, Modo? She feels guilty."
"Hey, he's wakin' up."
" `Bout time."
"Hey. How ya feeling?"
". I'm freezing What happened? Where's Charley?"
"Take it easy bro. Charley's fine. It's you we're worried about."
"Well don't be. A young mouse like me won't go down so easy."
"Right. After a near death experience he goes back to bragging."
"Aren't those experiences supposed to change a person?"
"Hey, I'm still here you know!"
"How could we not notice?"
"Hey Charley! How's ma little darlin'?"
"I'm fine, thank you."
"I meant the bike."
"Oh. She's fine. And you? Aren't you supposed to be in bed?"
"In bed? Please Charley, I couldn't do that! I need action!"
"What ever Vinnie, just try to take it easy for a while."
"Easy is not in my vocabulary, sweetheart."
"Anything for you babe. Just ask and I'll do it."
"Say Throttle, you see that?"
"Vinnie and Charley. Looks like they're really getting along."
"Maybe. Just hope Vinnie won't screw it up."
"You okay? You look a little pale."
"Throttle, I have white fur. I'm always pale."
"Okay, a little paler than usual."
"He's right bro. You do look a little colourless."
"Just a flu. Nothin' big."
"You okay Vinnie? You look a little pale."
"Oh man, get off my back will you?!"
"What did I do?"
"Just a bump to his ego."
"He has a cold."
"Oh. You sure it's just that? He looks really. I dunno, tired."
"Oh who knows with Vinnie. The guy's always a bit weird."
"I heard that!"
"Charley! Throttle's picking on me!"
"Now, now, children. Let's not get violent. Please?"
"They're past the point of no return, Charley-ma'am. Hey, wait for
"No, Modo, not you too! Sigh Those mice"
"Vinnie no! Not the-"
"chair. Oh boy, here we go again."
"Wait, *cough*, wait! I surrender!"
"Hey bro, you okay?"
"*cough*, Just, *cough*, just a little out of breath."
"That's it mister!"
"You promised me you'd take it easy!"
"That was days ago!"
"It was the day before yesterday. Now go to bed!"
"I'm a big mouse, Charley, I can take care of myself!"
"Doesn't look like it!"
"Charley, you- *cough, cough*!!"
"Whoa! Is that blood? Throttle, something's really wrong."
"You think? He's burning up. Let's get him upstairs."
"Sure you can, bro. Just a cold you say?"
"You happy now, Vincent? I tried to warn you, but noo"
"Come on Charley-girl It's just a flu."
"Don't talk. It'll make your cough worse."
"Sorry I yelled at you"
"I'm sorry too. Now get some sleep. Wouldn't want you to be bed ridden,
now would we?"
"Only if you were bed ridden with me."
"Don't even think about it, Vinnie. Just try to sleep. I'll check on
you in a few minutes."
"I feel like a little kid"
"Well you are the youngest aren't you?"
"What did they say?"
"Not much. Stoker contacted one of the doctors and he figured it's
just a flu."
"I agree. I think we're overreacting."
"You're wrong Throttle."
"He's burning up, seriously. And it's getting worse all the time. He
can't even talk anymore!"
"Hey, the day's first good news yet!"
"Quit it you guys! I checked the medical book for his symptoms and
I hate to say this but I think he's got pneumonia."
"Pneumonia, a lung infection. It's kinda early to say, but that's what
it looks like to me."
"I've never heard of a lung infection. Have you?"
"Nope. It sounds bad"
"Don't worry Throttle. We have antibiotics that can cure it."
"What happens if it's not cured?"
"Have people died of this pneumonia?"
"Why do you ask? I already said we have medicine."
"Earth medicine, Charley girl. We're Martian. You're cures might not
work on him."
" It's very rare that someone dies"
"But without medicine it's more common, isn't it?"
". Yes I'm calling Jack."
"He knows a lot more about these thing than I do. And we can't take
Vinnie to a hospital, can we?"
"Alright. We'll wait for what Jack has to say, then we get Mars back
"I hope I'm wrong about this"
"Me too, Charley-ma'am."
"Oh professor, what a depressing day. Even though those Martian rodents
haven't been around lately, I have the city bank drooling to get their hands
on my money."
"But your lactaviousness, isn't that the money you stole from the bank?"
"They don't know that you imbecile! *sigh*, My economy seems to be
failing me once again, and with no support from Lord Camembert nor the Plutarkian
government, I'm doomed."
"How sadheh, heh"
"That goes for you too! If I can't get money soon, I wouldn't be able
to pay you now would I?"
"*gasp!* Err, we shouldn't despair yet, your smelly cheesiness, I'm
sure we can think of something."
"Oh yes of course, something brilliant like our polka missile!"
"You did say polka is a rock musician's worst nightmare come true."
"Well, it still wasn't enough to get rid of the mice."
"Mister Limboiger, we're back!"
"I'm thrilled. Well, how did it go?"
"I think da mouses are in trouble. One of them was missing."
"Yeah boss, only two came to stop us and da money-"
"Never mind the money! Which one was missing?"
"Da one with the white fur and da red bike."
"Vincent Van Wham."
"I know his name, Carbuncle! Quickly, find out why he was missing!
We might be able to turn this to our advantage."
"Perhaps it has something to do with what happened last week, your
"Last week..? Yes, yes, things are definitely starting to look up."
"The medicine isn't working."
"Dammit! There's no medicine on Mars either."
"So there's nothing we can do?"
"Well, there's nothing I can do, that's for sure."
"Thanks for trying Jack."
"Don't worry about it Throttle. Listen, I'm sure they'll figure out
"Throttle, Modo! Come quick!"
"He's delirious. What's he saying, is it Martian?"
"It's been a while since I last heard Martian, but I think he's saying
something about his mom. And Harley."
"Harley...? Oh, I seewell, we really have to get his fever down."
"Any word from Mars?"
"They don't have anything that could help."
"Vinnie? It's okay. We're here."
"Harley? Come back don't leave me I miss you"
"He thinks you're Harley."
"Poor baby I'm here It's okay."
"Try to sleep, Vinnie. You'll be okay, I promise."
"Come back Harley"
"Don't worry, I'll be right here."
"Whaddya mean Jack?"
"Open your eyes Throttle! Charley likes him. A lot. Jeez, no wonder
Carbine's tired of waiting for you."
"That was low, Jack."
"Sorry. Didn't mean it the way it sounded. Guess I'm just a little
"Hey, we're all pretty tired. I doubt even punching Limburger could
cheer us up!"
"Now there's an idea."
"Heh hee Jack, Modo, wanna go for a ride?"
"Don't you dare leave me here alone with him!"
"What if he wakes up? Or what if he starts getting worse? Oh yeah,
and I don't speak Martian!!"
"Aww, Charley, we need to hit something!"
"Modo's right. And since it's Limburger's fault Vinnie's sick, why
"Don't worry Charlene, I'll stay with you."
"Thanks Jack. I guess chivalry is not dead yet, after all."
"Alright! Let's go kick some Plutarkian butt!"
"You got it, big bro!"
"Excuse us, but before you leave, might we have a word with you?"
"*sniff* Pfff, judging from the smell, our guest is Limburger himself
and his trusty old side-kick Carbuncle."
"Alright you scum sucking low-life-"
"I come in peace, my furry friends."
"Some nerve calling us friends."
"It has come to my attention that one of your team mates has fallen
"Wonder who's fault that is?"
"Despite our previous quarrels, I, Lawrence Lactavious Limburger, am
willing to offer my help."
"Why would we want your help?"
"Perhaps I ought to rephrase my suggestion. I'm willing to cure your
"Here it comes"
"-IF you will work for me."
"He has got to be kidding!"
"Easy now Modo, I'm sure Hamburger can find his way out without our
"It's Limburger. And I'm afraid you have no choice but to agree. Unless
you want to lose your friend."
"Oh, do agree. There is no medicine on Mars, and Earth's science simply
isn't advanced enough."
"You're only hope is Doctor Carbuncle. And me."
"What do you want us to do?"
"Oh mama, this really sucks!"
"All yours, professor. And don't screw this up, or else"
"*gulp* Y-y-yes sir!"
"Glad we agree. I'll be in my office. I'll have to receive my promotion
from Lord Camembert."
"*phew* Alright, let's see about our patient then, shall we?"
"Throttle, you sure we did the right thing? This stinks big time!"
"I know Modo, but when Vinnie's life is in danger, do you really think
we have a choice?"
"Moving him to your lab wore him out! There's no way you can start
working on him now!"
"Be quiet you filthy rodent! Doesn't your new boss have work for you?"
"Throttle tell me again why we agreed to this?"
"Carbuncle, remember the deal. Charley and Jack stay here. If anything
goes wrong, you'll be having close encounters with these."
"I'd listen to him. He's pretty handy with his nuke-nucks."
"What a jerk. I swear, when this is over, he's gonna get it!"
"Thanks Charley-girl. You be careful too."
"Don't worry about me. Or Vinnie. Me and Jack will keep him safe."
"Man, I hate doing this. I bet Limburger planned this all along."
"I know. I hate this too. But for Vinnie's sake."
"I can imagine his face when he wakes up."
"It'll be worth waiting for!"
"Take care, Charley. We'll be back."
"Modo, that's the tenth time you say that."
"I know and it still sucks! Just look at us! Here we are, robbing a
bank for a Plutarkian."
"So what do you want me to do about it?!"
"You're the leader! Think of something!"
"I never said I was your leader!"
"*deep breath* Throttle, I'm sorry."
"Me too, big bro. This is just so frustrating."
"You said it."
"And I know there's something fishy about all this."
"Yep. Even a blind mouse could see that! Carbuncle would never help
"But that doesn't change the fact that we have no choice."
"*sigh* Right again. All we can do is keep our eyes open and-"
"Rob a bank."
"This is extremely interesting. His body is so different from a human's
body, that the infection has evolved to pneumonia from the simple respiratory
"A flu, you imbecile! No wonder you're just a mechanic."
"Hey! Let's try to concentrate here! There's no time to fight."
"*humph* I'll have to run a complete analysis of his body until I can
start working on the cure."
"You do that. Charley, how is he?"
"He's getting worse. I can't get his fever down and if this keeps up"
" nnghHarley it's cold"
"Hang on Vinnie, please hang on."
" I can't breatheHarley!"
"The infection is causing his breathing to slow down. His lungs don't
have enough strength to take in breaths. Together with his apparent nightmares,
he won't be able to breathe himself for much longer."
"And his fever makes it even worse."
"Asphalt, do you think Carbuncle'll really treat him?"
"No. No I don't think so. But I'll keep my eyes open. I know a few
medical tricks myself if you know what I mean."
"Ah, miss Davidson, what can I do for you?"
"It's been four days and your friend the fruitcake hasn't accomplished
"You must understand that this takes time."
"Oh I understand and you can stuff your time right up your-"
"Now, now, let's be civil. I'm sure the good doctor is doing the best
"I'll tell you something, Limburger. Your deal stinks. We're doing
our part, and if Vinnie isn't starting to feel better soon, the deal is
"Hmm, a feisty little creature. Carbuncle!!"
"Yes your cheesiness?"
"The mice and their groupie are getting suspicious. How are we getting
"Just fine, your holy lardiness. I have the mouse's anatomy completely
"Excellent. How soon can we start?"
"Mr. Van Wham is as good as dead and will pose no threat. It's the
other mice I'm worried about. As soon as they and their friends Davidson
and McCyber are out of the way, the invasion can start."
"Most outstanding, professor! Lord Camembert will be pleased. Now that
we have every single detail of the mice's anatomy, they will be so much
easier to defeat. Mars and Earth are as good as ours!"
"Sweetheart? Charley, wake up."
"Mmh, wassup Jack?"
"We were right about everything. Limburger's not planning to help Vinnie.
We have to get outta here right now."
"How do you-"
"I followed you when you gave Limburger your lecture. After that I
eavesdropped on him when he talked to Carbuncle. They wanted to know everything
about the Martian's anatomy to know how to defeat them more easily."
"And we played right in to their hands."
"We have to inform Throttle and Modo plus get out of here."
"And how do we do that? Limburger has goons all over the place, and
I'd hate to Vinnie any more than necessary."
"I don't think we have a choice but to move him. Try to contact the
bros, I'll copy as much as I can from Carbuncle's files."
"Yet another successful robbery."
"You worry me Throttle. You're starting to sound like you're enjoying
"Hey, even you have to admit this is better than just sitting on our
tails doing nothing. Just as long as no one gets hurt."
"You're sick, bro."
"No, I'm not sick. But Vinnie is."
"Modo! It's Charley. D'ya hear me?"
"I'd rather you did that. Limburger's been playing us for fools. I
think it's time our deal came to an end."
"Say no more, sweetie. We'll be right there."
"I knew it! It was all just a trick!"
"Let's ride, big bro. We gotta get them outta there."
"EEH! My equipment! What are you doing?!"
"Pipe down, doc! How're we doing, Charley?"
"Everything's ready. We'll have to be quick when we go. I don't know
how long Vinnie can breathe on his own."
"Would someone shut him up, please?"
"Thank you. An' here comes the cavalry now. What took you so long?"
"Hey, we were busy robbing a bank, okay? Cut us some slack, will you?"
"Come on. We have to go and fast!"
"Right! Hang on Charley-girl!"
"*sigh* Torpedoing Limburger's tower wasn't the same without Vinnie."
"Cheer up Modo, I'm sure your people will figure something out."
"Let's hope so, Charley-ma'am. But what ever they figure out, they'd
better do it fast. He can barely breathe! And all because of a stupid virus!"
"Well, at least we wrecked Limburger's plans."
"Hey, listen up! I called Carbine and she's sent a ship for us. So
get yer stuff, `cause we leave yesterday!"
"This decease is common to Earth, but it's completely new to us and-"
"Cut the crap, doc! Just tell us if he'll be okay!"
"Easy there, big fella..."
"Sorry, he tends to get a bit edgy when a friend of ours is dying."
"You don't have to be sarcastic, Throttle. It's not like I lack all
emotions you know. So, as I was saying, the decease is new to us, but thanks
to modern science, we have a very good chance of curing him."
"Oh thank God. Can we see him?"
"Oh course, Miss Davidson. But remember, he needs a lot of rest, and
hasn't regained consciousness yet."
"He looks better."
"No he doesn't, Throttle. You heard what the doc said, it's like he
doesn't want to get better."
"Hey, cheer up Charley. He'll pull thru this."
"And if he doesn't? Oh, I just wish I could talk to him."
"Modo, you could-"
"No, Throttle, I couldn't."
"What are you two talking about?"
"Remember when we met and I showed you Mars with my antennas?"
"Yeah. You mean you could talk to Vinnie like that?"
"Yep we could, but a long time ago I promised Vinnie that I would never
do that to him. You see Charley, if I wanted to talk to him now, I would
need to gowell, sorta inside his head an' his thoughts in to a kinda dream
world. And you know Vinnie, he's very keen on keeping his thoughts to himself."
"So you mean you wont do it? Modo, he's life is on the line here! Please,
I'm begging you!"
"All right, but he wont like this."
"Vinnie? Vincent, where are you?"
"Go away Modo."
"I told you never to come here."
"Yes, and I'm sorry about that, but we want you back."
"I don't want to go back."
"Why would I? There's nothing there. Just pain and misery."
"If you're hurting, why didn't you tell us? You know we would have
"You have your own problems to deal with. I guess I didn't want to
bother you with mine."
"That's stupid, Vinnie."
"No it's not. *sigh* I'm tired, Modo. I feel like if I go back,
I'd fall apart and no one would be there to put me back together."
"We will. Me and Throttle and Charley."
"She told me to give you a message. She wants you to come back."
"I I can't. What if she goes like Harley did?"
"If you keep thinking like that for the rest of your life, you'll be
something you've always tried so hard not to be; a loser!"
"Trust me, I've been where you are. When my wife died, I thought nothing
mattered. But you and Throttle were still there, and all my other friends
and my momma. Grief should be dealt with, Vinnie! You can't ignore it!"
"I don't know how Every time I try it hurts."
"That's because you try to deal with it all by yourself. You have to
learn that we are here for you."
"She can't hear you bro. But she knows you can hear her, and she wont
Vinnie! Please come back!
"No! I can't!"
Please, I need you! Please!
"Modo, how do I know she really means it? How do I know that you wont
all just leave me?"
"We're your bros, Vinnie, why would we leave you?"
Vinnie, please come back. I love you!
THE REAL WORLD;
"Welcome back. You had a pretty rough night, but the doc says you'll
be okay now. And don't worry, I'll be right here."
"Thank you, Charlenefor loving me."
"*smile* You're welcome, Vincent. And I do love you, very much."
"I love you too, sweetheart."